run out of womb

... learning how to be a mum from scratch

Monday 25 April 2016

"I offered a glass of wine to my one-year-old..." knackered mum stories

You know when you do something really stupid because you're so sleep-deprived/pregnant/knackered? 

At nine months' pregnant, I went to the gym for a long swim. I was gone two hours and when I got ready to leave, I couldn't find my car keys. I searched for half an hour (with the gym team scouring the changing rooms) - and was about to call my husband to ask him to catch a bus to me with our spare key - when I realised the keys were in the ignition of the car... Which was - somehow - still in the car park.

Here honest mums of Facebook reveal their #nosleepmama moments - so we all know we're not alone... Share yours at the bottom of the post.

"I tried to turn my youngest down with the tv remote. Couldn't work out why it wasn't working.."

"I once made up a [baby's] bottle of black coffee."

"I answered the door to the postman with my boob hanging out after breastfeeding - had forgotten to put it away.."

"I thought my dog had gone missing, called the dog warden, had all my family out searching for her. I then realised a hour or so later I'd forgotten to get her out of my car... I was very embarrassed and the doggy got lots of cuddles."

"I normally show my son the fruit and the yoghurt and he chooses which one he eats first. I had already opened the pot so when I showed it to him I poured it over him. Both my partner and my son could not stop laughing.."

"I put the remote in the fridge and took the butter in the front room with me! After half an hour of watching TV I couldn't figure out why the butter was in the front room.."

"I tried to put on my four-year-old's coat on me, when I was in a hurry to leave the house!"

"I took a dirty nappy to work in my packed lunch bag and when I got home I checked the bin outside my house and I had thrown my lovely sandwich in the bin on my way out.."

"Made  cup of tea, sat down to drink it and I thought, 'oh, where is it?' Looked every where and eventually found it in a kitchen cupboard where our tins are stored! Still no idea how I ended up putting it there.."

"I dropped my husband at the train station one morning very early and quickly popped to the shop for milk. I walked home and only when I noticed I was carrying the car keys and wearing PJ bottoms did I remember that I had driven there...."

"I drove to take the dog for a walk and left the dog at home! Hormones!"

"When my youngest was newborn I had a stinking cold... went to rub Vicks on my chest but accidentally used my husband's hair wax.."

"This morning I squeezed facewash onto my toothbrush.."

"I sat in the passenger seat of my car wondering why I wasn't going anywhere.... Took about a minute for me to realise I was supposed to be in the drivers seat driving! There was no one else..."

"Keep referring to the cot as the hutch (we have a rabbit), as in 'I'll just put the baby in the hutch'.. But nothing beats when I was pregnant and I sat down and did a wee without pulling my knickers down - no rush, I just forgot..."

"I woke up feeling so tired everything was blurry....said to myself I'll wake up in a moment and it wont be blurry anymore. Got into the car with the kids, still blurry, drove a few metres and realise the blurriness is related to the fact I totally forgot to put on my glasses (which I usuallly wear full time. .."

"It was time to feed my youngest and I was on an important phone call. My son came in the room and I automatically laid him on the bed to feed him whist still on the phone. I couldn't understand why he wasn't drinking. I looked at him to find I'd put the wrong child on my breast staring at me in shock with his mouth wide open!!"

"Last week I offered the glass of wine to my 1 yr old instead of the glass of water....turns out he quite liked it, whenever he sees wine now he points and howls!"

"I shoplifted a pair of leggings - put them on top of my pram and forgot about about them, walked out the shop and the alarms went off and they came running after me! I cried and they weren't very sympathetic!!"

"Left an entire trolley full of shopping in the car park... Didn't realise till I got home and opened the boot. Luckily it was still there when I went back!"

"Put the dirty laundry in the bin instead of the washing machine..."

"Once I got into the shower still wearing bra and knickers and turned on the water...."

"Lost my husbands car keys in the bakery when I borrowed his car. Had to get a lift home and didn't realise the keys were in the bakery as I was convinced if only been to the butcher and must have left then there.... A week later I got them back from the baker!"

"I put my one year old's nappy on my three year old and only realised after my daughter shouted at me, 'mummy what are you doing!'"

"Put my daughter in the bath the other day with her socks still on. Didn't notice until she started saying sockies and trying to take them off.."

"Threw my iPhone 6 in the outside green bin, threw away £80 cash inside an envelope and I also threw my Ray Bans away too when I got distracted with a wipe in one hand and glasses in the other - brain thought 'proceed to bin' and as I was so tired I threw them in and realised after the bin was collected the next day.."

"I sat at the table rocking the buggy for ages, trying to get my baby to sleep while having lunch at a restaurant, until my four-year-old niece asked me why I was rocking the buggy - the baby wasn't in there.."

"When my first was a newborn I unloaded the 'tumble dryer' and folded nearly all the clothes before I realised they hadn't been washed... I couldn't laugh at the time because I was steaming with anger at the loss of valuable baby nap time!"

"I tried plugging my phone charger into a Tracker bar.."

"I heard my phone ring & picked up my coffee cup, putting it sideways to my ear. Coffee everywhere. All down my back & over the sofa.. Took me a good few seconds to compute the whole thing.."

"Packed our bags and got into the car this morning with my little girl and drove off for our days activities...leaving our front door wide open.."

"My husband put a banana through the dishwasher. And put yoghurt in his ear whilst giving the phone to the baby.."

"I tried to add a 'peppa' to my Tesco shop when shopping for vegetables online..."

"I got in the shower once going through the routine of washing my hair I realised I had only just had a shower an hour before and forgot.. I also once got myself and the baby out of the car and left the car door open wide ALL night and of course it rained heavily that night..."

"I walked out the front door with my baby...and my right boob hanging out! Took me a while to realise but good job it was a nippy day..!"

"I tried to give my nan my baby's bottle of formula, and put baby's dummy in husband's mouth.."

"I felt the volume was too high so pointed the remote at tv but wondered why the sound wouldn't wouldn't lower..yup remotes don't work on kids..!"

"Once while reading a printed letter I tried to scroll down the page using my computer mouse and couldn't work out why it wasn't working. Needed sleep so bad!"

"The other morning I opened the dishwasher and threw my laundry inside.."

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